Well, it’s April 1st.
No joke.
And I have yet to hear back from either Brock or York about whether they want to let this girl into their establishment.
No joke.
Here’s the funny part. This week’s ‘mind theme’ (you know, the thing you are thinking about alot alot? The thing that seems like God *might* be trying to teach you about?) has been about waiting. Just yesterday, my dad told me this brilliant thought: Waiting is God’s way of giving us the maximum amount of joy. Yes, it’s about God’s glory for sure, and yes, it’s definitely about God teaching us things in the process, but I think in a big way it’s about God letting us have the most pleasure once we actually receive what we’ve been waiting for.
For example, during lent I’ve had to learn new ways to use my ‘extra’ time. I love reading, but you can only read for so long. So I took up sewing. To date, I’ve finished 3.974 projects (the last one just needs buttons!) and I’ve discovered I really enjoy it. There is something so satisfying about seeing something come together and be finished, after you’ve spent so much time on it. Interestingly, the pleasure of seeing the finished garment is greater if I’ve put more time into it.
So yesterday I was all game for this waiting thing. I was like, “Yes! I’m okay with waiting. I want the best for sure!” …But when I came online to check my application status last night and it wasn’t up by midnight, I started to get nervous. And impatient. By 1pm, I was starting to feel defeated.
When I “woke” up this morning and checked again at 8:30, there was nothing. I felt exhausted. When I called the admissions office to make sure I hadn’t fallen off the system at 9:45 they told me I would just have to wait until the system updates; sometime this weekend or Monday. Let’s just say that there were a few tears shed, when all my hopes pinned on April 1st came crashing down. Dramatic? Maybe. …But I haven’t been sleeping well for like the last 4 weeks. Give the girl a break.
Anyways, I was talking with my friend Rhiannon through out this whole process and she mentioned something somebody told her, and I loved it. …Right now, I’m not so gung-hoe, but we’re working on that….
His “yes”, his “go”, is so much sweeter than our “I’m going”
I’m working on the perfect yes– the one that comes directly from the mouth of God. In the meantime, I wait, I hope in His joy, trusting that He has promised to come through with a GREAT thing and He can’t lie.
…And I’ll try not to check my application status every 15 minutes over the next 3 days.
What you’ll find here is a collection of musings, thoughts, writings, and ramblings about things I’m reading, watching, and thinking about. It’s my goal to inspire, encourage, and instruct my fellow sisters in their walk with Jesus and their understanding of the Word.
- Erika Recommends: Best Books of 2021 - December 15, 2021
- Slow-Going in the Fast Lane - October 14, 2021
- A Taste You Can Feel In Your Cheeks - September 29, 2021
Argh! When you think things will finally be over, and you’ve been rationing yourself for that day, and it does come, it make the future feel so elusive. Yet, you always seem to be ready to learn a new lesson and eager (well at least willing) to learn how to trust again and more deeply, that’s awesome! I will take this to heart, as I’m trying to figure out what God wants me to do with the rest of my life, or even my summer. So far, I have no leading… I just want to “know”, even if I do trust that He knows.
I’m praying for you,
Matt <